Getting let down by other people, be it from relationships close to you or otherwise, is an experience that everyone goes through. What drives people to say certain things and react certain ways with us is all influenced by our own behavior. It comes to a question of how do we treat ourselves and why do we let others to turn us down.
We need to love ourselves so much that we don’t allow anyone else to bring us down. Having said this, other people do affect our patterns of thinking and reacting and can negatively impact our self-esteem and confidence. There are two things you need to remember in this situation. First, make a deliberate effort to not react. second, remember that no one has the right to make you feel bad.
Here are several things you need to keep in mind for dealing with these kinds of people.
You Are Valued
Love, respect and value yourself first. If you do this right, it will never give someone the permission to make you feel bad. Give value to your own opinions, feelings and who you are. If you don’t, it means you lack self-esteem which isn’t a good sign and indicates how much you really believe in yourself and believe in how much you deserve.
Don’t Take Things Personally
If someone behaves with you a certain way, shouts at you and is mean to you with words, that’s their problem. Maybe it’s the way they feel about themselves and they need recognition. Sometimes, when a person feels bad about themselves and have an inferiority complex, they tend to treat people badly. However, this shouldn’t affect you because there is something wrong with them, not you.
Acceptance of Opinion
You need to accept that there are billions of people in this world and each one of them has their own opinion. However, these opinions don’t define you because they aren’t the truth. You need to believe in the truth of your being and understand that people have the right to freedom of speech so they can have diverse opinions about you. Also, keep in mind that having an opinion and being disrespectful are completely different so if someone is being disrespectful towards you, remind them that you can also say something to offend them.
Keep a Fine Distance
It’s better to be distant from people who let you down because they add toxicity into your life, for no reason at all. Just focus on yourself and do what makes you happy. However, if you cannot distance yourself physically, you can at least distance yourself emotionally. For example, if they are your colleague, talk to them only about work. Being aware of yourself and others’ behavior is important. Keep in mind that every action doesn’t need a reaction and if someone decides to shoot you with a bullet the first time, you don’t have to be their second target as well.
Cover illustration: Muzna Roghay